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Monday, January 14, 2008

Family Matters - Imparting VALUES in young minds

Every parent wants the best for their child. But besides achieving good grades in school, it's equally vital for children to be equipped with the right values. For example, respect for others, honesty and kindness, just to name a few.

Here are some ways for a parent to help her child grasp and learn about these values.

Building Self - Esteem

For a young child to be socially competent, she must first be confident about herself. Thus, building strong and positive self-esteem is important. A child who feels loved and competent is more likely to have a healthy sense of social and emotional well-being.


1. Communicate regularly with your child, so that you are fully aware of how she feels and can lend support readily.

2. Recognise your child's abilities and successes. Praise, encourage and celebrate, even for small efforts taken to accomplish a task.

3. Share with them stories about how you / others learnt through mistakes and that it is alright to make mistakes.

4. Help children to recognise and verbalise their feelings; help them to solve problems in a constructive manner.

Showing Kindness

How to tell if a child has a problem showing kindness:

* Does the child show empathy towards others (including animals, plants and other living things in the environment)?

* Does the child take good care of her possessions, and those of others ?

* Is the lack of empathy or care for possessions a deliberate act of the child or due to inability to express it?


1. Model behaviours that you wish your children to practise.

2. Help children express their feelings; Guide them in using appropriate words

3. Create suitable opportunities for children to show kindness.

4. Demonstrate kind, non - aggressive methods of communication.

Being Honest

How to tell if a child has a problem being honest:

* Does the child consistently bring home things that do not belong to her?

* Do you constantly end up confused when you try to get a straight answer from her?

* Does the child feel bad about breaking his promises?


1.Do not over-react if children exhibit dishonest behaviour. Giving too much attention may actually reinforce that behaviour. The child may become inclined to repeat it as it gets her attention.

2. Be sensitive. On the one hand, children must not think that morally unacceptable conduct is all right; on the other, they shouldn't be frightened to such a degree that they are afraid to admit and discuss it with you.

3. Establish a positive parent - child relationship. Children need to feel safe to be frank, open and honest with their parents.

4. Do not put children in a spot when they are caught lying or stealing.

5. Discuss misbehaviour when you are calm and children don't feel threatened.

A Sense of Responsibility

How to tell if a child lacks a sense of responsibility?

* Does the action truly reflect irresponsibility or is it just a typical childish behaviour.

* Does the child's action upset the home routine? Every child has a tendency to ignore rules.


1. Provide children with opportunities to be responsible. Allow them the freedom to make decisions and learn form their mistakes.

2. Set appropriate expectations. The expected action or behaviour should match the child's intellectual, physical and emotional abilities.

3. Take time to show children how to do an assigned task correctly. However, focus on what they are learning about responsibility and recognise their efforts.

Resource - From the series of Family Matters, supported by the Ministry of Community Development, Youth and Sports.

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Anonymous Qhoen said...

What a great valuable write.

Thanks for Sahring it.

Best Wishes

January 16, 2008 at 12:50 AM  
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January 16, 2008 at 12:51 PM  
Blogger Tidbits Of Tammy said...

Wonderful Post! I feel many parents get so caught today that they forget their that they are the primary role model for their children. Great reminder!

April 9, 2008 at 3:43 PM  

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